- Be an active student of your self and your life.
Who are you? How are you…? Why are you…? Life is a mirror and we are constantly being revealed to ourselves. Are we paying attention? Taking time to get quiet and distill my own energy from everyone else’s is a vital part of this process.
- Love is freedom, not possession.
Love the being of a person, not the having of a person. Possession is an ever-enduring illusion.
- Choose your response.
We are free to choose how we are going to behave and what energy we are going to bring in every moment. As much as possible, I want to choose my response deliberately. Knee-jerk reactions are an unskillful way to maneuver through life. I want to be who I want to be independent of how/who others choose to be. My mantra is “amidst it all, be love.”
- Thank your way through it.
There’s value even in the valley.Â Everything isn’t what it seems. When we look back on our lives later, even if it doesn’t seem so now, we’ll find this amazing architecture we could’ve never dreamed of. The key, I’m learning, is to be grateful for it all. Create the meaning along the way.
- Kindness begets kindness.
Karma is real. Keep doing you and watch the return. I dropped $4 during a trip to the store. All I had on me was that $4 specifically to purchase some food for work. It fell out of my pocket and someone stopped me to return it. Small, yes, but still huge. 🙂 As Will Smith said, “Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.”
- You are a gift.
You are here on purpose. Your love is a gift. Your forgiveness is a gift. Even your gifts are your gifts.
The time is coming upon us to discuss David Deida‘s The Way of the Superior Man. There will be a conference call discussion this Wednesday, February 23rd, at 9pm EST. If you are planning or contemplating joining, please email me so I can send you the conference call number.
I look forward to sharing insights and experiences. 🙂
Originally written in 1997 by Chicago Tribune columnist, Mary Schmich, under the title “Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young”, Baz Luhrmann set it to music and released “Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)” in 1999.
There’s some great advice in here, such as:
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind.
You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they’ve faded.
But trust me, in 20 years, you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now
how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.
You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts.
Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Sunday night, bassist, composer and singer Esperanza Spalding became the first jazz artist to win a Grammy for Best New Artist. It’s kind of a big deal. I’ve been intending to listen to her music for a while and the opportunity knocked me upside the head yesterday when my friend, artist/designer/deejay/conversationalist extraordinaire, Alvin Black III, decided to repost his Essential Esperanza mix he compiled back in December to celebrate her Grammy win.
It’s a really nice introduction to her work. So much so that I’m already making plans to buy a concert ticket. Budget? What budget? 😉 I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
The most amazing things about life are the adventures we go on — the ones we embark upon and the ones that carry us away, without consultation, and leave us somewhere we hadn’t planned on being, yet still appreciate. It happens all the time, and the journeys can be internal or external.
Right now, I’m on such a journey. A spontaneous visit to my favorite bookstore in the city led me to a book called Why Forgive? that I picked up to gift a friend. Sometimes, we choose books, and sometimes, books choose us; this book chose me, and I’m so very grateful it did.
On my commute home, I began reading it and was almost immediately touched. It’s impossible to read and not get a bit emotional. Since my contact with Why Forgive?, I’ve been on a forgiveness spree. It dominates my thoughts. I’ve been letting go of grievances both large and small and exercising more empathy. We’ve all hurt others. We’ve all inflicted wounds and caused unintended damage.
Love, forgiveness, and relationships have been occupying most of my mental space recently, which is why the last few posts have been about that. It’s the running theme of my life right now, and you can expect more inquiry and exploration in that department. I think it’s helpful for everyone.
On that note, I’m revisiting Don Miguel Ruiz’s The Mastery of Love: A Practical Guide to the Art of Relationship. The third and seventh chapters, titled “The Man Who Didn’t Believe in Love” and “The Dream Master”, both struck a chord with me. I hope they offer something valuable to you as well. Click the links for transcripts of each chapter.
Don Miguel Ruiz’s Mastery of Love, chapter 3: “The Man Who Didn’t Believe in Love”, 9:23
Don Miguel Ruiz’s Mastery of Love, chapter 7: “The Dream Master”, 4:19
There’s a couple I’ve seen at my job a few times. One of the last times they came in, we started talking about my hair and the husband mentioned how his hair was when he was a teenager.
“It’s true. We were dating back then,” the wife said.
I asked how long they’d been together.
“If you could give me just one key to making it last, what would it be?” I asked.
The wife looked at the husband for a split second, then looked at me and said, “Be friends. We really like each other.”
“Lust is easy. Romance is easy. You have to really like the person, like who they are and enjoy being around them. All the other stuff is easy.” the husband added.
I just smiled as they talked. Then, the wife asked me if I had a boyfriend.
With a big smile, I said, “No, but I have a friend.”
I saw that same couple yesterday and made a point to tell them how often I think of their words. Turns out they were celebrating their anniversary, their daughter’s birthday, and the birth of their first grandchild. 🙂
Love is a beautiful imperative.
Sunday night, I posted four words on my Facebook page: “love is so important.” Doing so resulted in a very interesting, enlightening, and inspiring dialogue. I’m still meditating on the truths revealed in this conversation and hope they are of some value to you.
love is so important.
Sonny: NO SHIT! It’s crazy cause sometimes [it’s] hard to come by. Real Love anyways! and People abuse [it] like its in abundance. only thing in abundance in this world these days is corruption.
Kalifa: You can do anything with Love, but nothing can be accomplished without it.
Leandra: nothing but destruction. @sonny corrupted love is in abundance. i think love is everywhere, but it’s hard to see it behind all the lenses and filters…
Sonny: yes I agree. People don’t want to be loved they want to be secure in the falsehood of 401k’s, spring trips to Turks, A lease on a Lexus, a marriage based on business, Love falls far behind this other priorities. people have a tuff time accepting love and honest. Like Jack Nicholas said “you can’t handle the Truth”.
Leandra: “you can’t handle the truth.” word. most times, no.
“people don’t want to be loved…” i disagree. i think they do. i think they do desperately, but they don’t know how to be loved. and they don’t know how to love. they don’t know how to love and accept themselves so extending it to others is impossible. this is my daily task. for real. i wish it were the same for others.
all the superficial accouterments people seek to gain and glorify are simply temporary fillers for a deeper hole that can only be satisfied with something real, honest, and pure.