In analyzing myself, I’ve noticed how much I give my opinion. Without request. “There it is, I’ll give it to you.” While I appreciate the boldness, albeit blind, and openness of it, I’m just one person of nearly seven billion. I certainly don’t want to know everyone’s opinion on everything because…I don’t care. And, in most cases, unless someone asks me, they don’t care about mine.

Hmmm.

I need to humble myself. In fact, I’m about to. I’m going to see what happens when I focus on only saying what’s necessary. If it doesn’t improve upon silence, must it be said?

Enter the silence.

• On music: It’s amazing. It’s awesome. It’s super powerful. It’s healing… It’s distracting. Sometimes. When I disconnect and listen to vocal-less music, I’m connected to myself and insights on life. It relaxes me and makes life a bit more otherworldly. Ambrose Akinmusire’s When the Heart Emerges Glistening and Robert Glasper’s Double Booked are soothing my spirit right now.
• On desire: We’re not supposed to have everything we think we want. Or when we want it.
• On life: Talents are our gifts — to us and to others. Burying them only shortchanges us and minimizes our contribution. Follow your bliss.
• Practice love. Be loving. Don’t let pain, and subsequent anger, blind you to your love. You love because you are love and expressing it is the highest joy. So express it. Live it. Be love in motion.

Intense feelings can lead to anger, a secondary emotion. By secondary emotion, I mean you feel something else before you actually feel anger. Tune in on that emotion. Feel that. What need do you have that isn’t being met, or is being violated? Safety? Honesty? Affection? Respect? Attention?

Use your anger as emotional feedback, as a barometer indicating when you’re in the red. When you know the underlying feelings and missing needs in play, you can work more effectively towards resolving the situation peacefully and heathily.

There’s a fire, an urgency to being angry. Let it work for you, not against you. Understand it to use it.

Image Source: 3-Way Street by ronconcocacola

.

Once upon a time, I was a health zealot. Whether or not you asked, I’d gladly and immediately inform you of the contents of your food and any health risks they posed. My intention wasn’t to be a zealot; it was to be helpful. I was open and ready for that information and assumed everyone else was, too.

I was wrong.

Over time, I’ve ebbed and flowed with health. It’s prominence rises and falls. Over the course of the last year or so, it’s fallen. I’ve had beef (I thought it was veal), I’ve had pork (I knew it was pork), and I’ve consumed lots and lots of sugar. As of late, however, my attention to health has been on the rise.

It’s not even necessarily what’s present in my diet, so much as what’s been missing: easily digestible, nutrient rich plant-based foods.

Preventative health, mostly based around diet, used to be such a large focus in my life, and over time has dwindled away. But I miss it. I believe in it. I want it back.

That said, last week, I decided to detox by eating raw foods for two weeks. At first, I was super nervous, even tentative about lasting the entire time. By the time the first day arrived, I was mentally prepared and fully committed. On the second day, I realized it was my one year anniversary of moving to New York (sentimental, I know) and decided to, on day three, treat myself to a dinner at the raw restaurant near my house.

Best decision ever. I’m so about to eat lots of raw foods. Not just for the next two weeks, but period. I’m interested in optimal health.

I saw the Forks Over Knives trailer posted above and thought you’d be interested in knowing that optimal health is at the end of your fork.

If health and food politics are of interest to you, you may also like:

• Sucker MDs
• Food, Inc.

Image Source: Amanda Pearl Blog

Born and raised in Vancouver, Severn Suzuki has been working on environmental and social justice issues since kindergarten. At age 9, she and some friends started the Environmental Children’s Organization (ECO), a small group of children committed to learning and teaching other kids about environmental issues. They traveled to 1992’s UN Earth Summit, where 12 year-old Severn gave this powerful speech that deeply affected (and silenced) some of the most prominent world leaders. The speech had such an impact that she has become a frequent invitee to many UN conferences.

Originally written in 1997 by Chicago Tribune columnist, Mary Schmich, under the title “Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young”, Baz Luhrmann set it to music and released “Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)” in 1999.

There’s some great advice in here, such as:

Then I’m reminded that the past is the past. Done. Over. Finito. I can only focus on forward movement to ensure future progress. However, it would probably be beneficial to reflect and see what roadblocks prevented me making the growth I apparently expected of myself, yet didn’t hold myself accountable for.

Are you where you planned to be now? Have you made the progress you anticipated? What will you do to get on track (your track)?

Someone around you can use some encouraging, some positive attention, a hug, an ear, or just a smile. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), every day, 3,000 people end their own lives. Many more have attempted, and countless others have considered it.

Life is such a precious gift, to us and to others. We are here for so much more than what we wear, where we work, or how much we earn. Even in the mundane is the extraordinary, and within the extraordinary are perhaps elements of the mundane.

Shine your light! Someone needs to see it, hear it, feel it. You are bigger than your “I”.

Learn the warning signs. If you know someone with any of those behaviors, find the good in them and share it with them. Sometimes, others see us more clearly than we see ourselves. If you, yourself, needs to talk to someone confidentially, call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) 24 hours a day. It’s a free call.

When I was in high school, I hated my life and thought about suicide. Fortunately, I never made any attempts, having some sort of hope that my circumstances would improve. They did! Life gets better. Life is an act of creation! You don’t have to play the victim; that’s a decision.

love&light…

The perpetual, invisible fork is the following question: how are you going to respond? To what? To everything.

We allow the outer world to control our inner world because we don’t understand that the more we control our inner world, the more we control the outer world.  It often acts the other way around, but we’re so much more effective in our lives when we understand this.  The past few weeks have proven this to be true.

Out of nowhere, my job suddenly became a place I slightly dreaded. I wasn’t even fully aware of it, but I noticed it when I realized time was my obsession. “What time is it?” and “how much longer will I be here?” Sure signs of danger. Everyone and everything was a problem and I played the victim to all the haphazard incidents and wrongdoings.

When somebody/everybody else is always the problem, maybe the problem is really you.

I toyed with this thought. Maybe it was me. Maybe people have been responding to my energy. Maybe I’ve been sweating all the small stuff. Maybe.

On my way to work one morning, I decided I’d be happy for no reason. No matter what. There was an immediate difference. My co-workers responded to me differently. My customers responded to me differently. The interactions were pleasant. Work was enjoyable again. I walked with a smile and the energy radiated.

I took the same approach the next day. Before leaving work, one of my co-workers asked, “Okay, what happened before you came into work yesterday?”

I smiled and said, “I changed my mind.”

I no longer dread my job. On the contrary, I rather enjoy interacting with such a variety of personalities.  Even when someone else isn’t pleasant towards me, I’m granted an opportunity to respond—not react—to them. I don’t have to allow them to ruin my good mood. Now when I start feeling frazzled by what’s going on, I remind myself to chill out and choose my response. It’s amazing how easy it is to be reactionary to everything and everyone, so much so that we forget we can choose how we will thoughtfully respond instead of taking the reflex reaction route.

We have the opportunity to choose our response all the time. We can decide what path will lead to further pain or greater pleasure. Be vigilant about finding these opportunities. Listen to the call, that urge for change. Check your frequency and watch the change.

You have power in your life.

I’m different. I’ve always been different, always felt different, but didn’t always have peace with it. Sometimes I fought it, bumped heads with others because of it, and even embraced it. It’s a sordid past I share with it. As I matured, though, I began to appreciate the fact that I was different. I eventually found it odd that most of us spend so much of our youth trying to fit in before usually spending the rest of our lives trying to distinguish ourselves. After all, aren’t we all different?

My official occupation for the past five years should read “nomad”. I’ve lived in New York, Philadelphia, Chicago, San Antonio, St. Louis, and even in an L.A. suburb. Right now, I’m on my way to South Korea. Each line of my resume places me in a different state and/or in a different industry so it’s quite likely that most companies seeking a long-term employee will immediately discard it upon review despite my qualifications; it doesn’t exactly scream company loyalty. Here’s the thing: I’m okay with that. Why? Because I’m different. That fact is evidenced not just by my thought process, hairstyle, interests or style of dress; my journey and choices are highly reflective of my individuality. My path hasn’t always been easy or glamorous, but it has been true to my essence as a free spirit.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, here’s a little something else: you’re different, too. You have dreams you haven’t followed, thoughts you haven’t shared, passions you haven’t explored. In short, you have a life you haven’t lived.

I’ve received both criticism and praise for living my life the way I have. Some well-intentioned people have urged me to “settle down.” Some folks seeking company in their misery have urged me to “settle down.” Some onlookers have told me I inspire them. However, nothing I do is for the acceptance or condemnation of others, but simply because I have to live on my terms. I could certainly make more money as I do so, and have started taking a greater interest in being more future-focused in terms of my personal economy. Yet, I don’t have too many complaints about this random and unpredictable lifestyle I’ve embraced. This journey has taught and exposed me to a lot. I’ve embraced a sort of freedom some don’t experience until retirement. The money that’s supposed to come along with retirement has often been missing thus far, but I’ve developed a pretty strong will against recklessly using my inner prostitute. You have a prostitute, too. It works a job you hate, but the money’s good or at least regular. It exchanges your energies with others in unfulfilling ways to serve some end, but would really rather not in a perfect world. It gives away your time, money, intellect, integrity, word, or self altogether for some form of physical, emotional, or social security. It may have led you down a path you truly seek to escape.

According to Caroline Myss, the prostitute is one of the four survival archetypes active in all of our lives. Its goal is to develop and protect our self-esteem and self-respect, but it’s easy to misunderstand the lessons we experience through this archetype. The prostitute archetype has taught me that it’s much better to take less money and be in line with my core beliefs—even if it’s a lot less money. It’s highly unlikely I’ll be endorsing a traditional diamond or gold retailer or become the poster child for a pharmaceutical or fast-food company. I’m unwilling to compromise my beliefs about the lack of integrity these systems represent. Just as unlikely is my submission to the appeals to normalcy in the shape of a “normal” job, a “normal” life, or “normal” choices. Normal simply means common. Common isn’t different. I embrace my difference, which can frequently exist outside the consideration of “normal”. Still, I don’t condemn normalcy. If it works for you, great, but I’ve found that it actually doesn’t work for a lot of folks. What I do, however, condemn is the pressure or criticism those embracing norms subject to those who don’t—most especially by those who have yet to analyze their compliance.

Undoubtedly, you’ve been in situations that have revealed your prostitute—its strength or weakness. The key is to make it work for you. It’s in all of us, but that’s not to say it works the same for all of us. Let yours serve your highest good. Let it support your dreams, security, self-esteem and self-respect. Let it teach you that there’s more to life than money and social acceptance. Find the good in its lessons—even the difficult ones—then begin or continue to live in synch with your values, passions, and purposes.

————
To read more about what’s considered the four survival archetypes, read this synopsis from Caroline Myss’ Sacred Contracts.